FIREPROOFING YOUR MARRIAGE

 Life Group Resource for NLCC—October 26, 2008

Welcome: 1^st of the four W’s                                                                                                 (10 minutes)

Ø  What constitutes an act of forgiveness?

Worship: 2^nd of the four W’s                                                                                                  (20 minutes)

Ø  Read Psalms 51:1-17 then ask discuss how these words bring comfort and expectations to your own life.

Word: 3^rd of the four W’s    “Forgiveness” Matthew 18:21-35                    (45 minutes)

Lessons From The Unmerciful Servant                                                        Matthew 18:21-35

Read and discuss the following lessons from the parable. How would this have an effect on the worlds we each live in if we practiced this kind of love? Describe those in your world would act if each of them wore the shoes of the characters in the parable—unmerciful servant, fellow servant and King.

MAIN POINT: Love/agape does not keep score!

–        “Forgiveness/MACROTHUMIA” in Greek means to set aside your anger.”

–        The amount of debt the KING is willing to forgive is astronomical No one borrows 150,000 years wages worth of debt—he was an embezzler.

–        The KING’s anger centers on the servants unwillingness to demonstrate “MACROTHUMIA” toward a fellow servant.

–        How we treat OTHERS matters more to God than how we treat Him.

–        Those who have been forgiven must forgive!

Seven Steps To Practice A Life-Style Of Forgiveness

Review the seven steps then discuss the points and identify where people could struggle when practicing a life-style of forgiveness.  At what point do you struggle?  Discuss the how the seventh step can be lived out in a life-style of forgiveness.

1. Make a decision with yourself to forgive!
2. Say it out loud—at least to yourself!
3. When you forgive—forgive!
4. Forgive completely!
5. Forgive repeatedly!
6. Forgiving does not mean forgetting!
7. Forgiving does not equate trust!

ALL MARRIAGES GO THROUGH SEASONS: 1) Romance,   2) Reality, 3) Resentment, and 4) Rebuilding. ONLY those that practice the #3 Rules of Lifetime Lovers: 1) Remembering that men and women are different and adapting accordingly, 2) Asking and being both willingly and intentional to ask for and practice forgiveness, and 3)Deciding to love and keep on loving, will move beyond the season of resentment and embrace the season of rebuilding. Are you committed to recognizing the season of your relationship and willing to be intentional about practicing the three rules of lifetime lovers? What intentional steps are you taking?

LOVE DARE CHALLENGE: can be accomplished, or at least begun to be accomplished by taking one of your hands and clenching it into a fist. Then ask yourself, “Is there someone in your world that you need to forgive?” That lack of forgiveness is what you’re clutching right now. Make a decision to process the seven steps of forgiveness, then release it by opening your hand and saying “I forgive you.”

Witness: 4^th of the four W’s                                                                                         (15 Minutes)

• Pray for God’s help in the restoration process as so many of us begin forgiving today. Thank God for the forgiven granted by Jesus. Commit these decisions to the Lord and pray for ability to peel the onion one layer more tomorrow, and the next day and the next day. Amen.
• Pray the Lord’s Prayer and when we get to the forgiveness phrase, pray it like you mean it.
• Pray for one another as requests are shared.  No one is ever forced to pray!